Of course, it is a miracle and an incredible blessing. But I wasn't referring to that.
I was referring to how it makes other people act. It's like they forget to use their brain. They see the big belly and all common sense goes away.
So today, in honor of the clueless people in the grocery store, gas station, neighborhood, etc. I am giving you a list of what NOT to say to pregnant women.
1. Wow! You are HUGE!
Yes, people really do say that.
2. How much weight have you gained.
This question is never okay, unless you are the doctor. Even then, it's iffy.
3. Oh! You're pregnant, I thought...nevermind.
Look, I know what you were going to say. No, I am not just fat!
4. Can you see your toes?
No, thanks for asking. Hence, why my toenails haven't been painted. Or my legs shaved. I can't see them, I can't even touch them.
5. So, are you going to get back into working out as soon as the baby comes? You know, to get your shape back?
What? I thought breastfeeding was the only calorie burner I needed!
6. Are you going...you know...natural?
Yes, putting on make up while in labor is highly over rated. OH! You weren't talking about make up?
7. Are you scared for childbirth, they say it is the most pain you will ever have.
Thanks for that. It's not like I can change my mind at this point.
8. Do you know if your baby is normal?
Well, consider the parents...
9. Do you have stretch marks yet? Or worse - How many stretch marks do you have?
How many do YOU have?? Sheesh. Besides, it's not like I inspect my body daily for these unwelcome marks. Not at all.
10. Are you going to eat ALL of that?
Yes, yes I am.
Freebie: Was this planned?
I can confidently answer this one. Yes, it was planned before the foundation of the world. Just not by me.